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Southern Bumper Stickers
  • The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette.
  • I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
  • Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
  • I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
  • Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive.
  • WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
  • You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
  • BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
  • I got a gun for my wife, best trade I ever made.
  • So you're a feminist...Isn't that cute!
  • Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
  • I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
  • I'm just driving this way to piss you off.
  • Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
  • Keep honking, I'm reloading.
  • As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.
  • I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather ... not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
  • God must love stupid people, he made so many.
  • Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
  • It IS as BAD as you think, and they ARE out to get you.
  • I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
  • Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
  • Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.

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