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A Guide to Effective Scientific Communication
It has long been known I haven't bothered to look up the reference
It is believed I think
It is generally believed A couple of other guys think so too
It is not unreasonable to assume If you believe this, you'll believe anything
Of great theoretical importance I find it kind of interesting
Of great practical importance I can get some mileage out of it
Typical results are shown The best results are shown
3 samples were chosen for further study The others didn't make sense, so we ignored them
The 4th sample was not studied I dropped it on the floor
The 4 hour determination may not be significant I dropped it on the floor, but scooped most of it up
The significance of these results is unclear Look at the pretty artifact
It has not been possible to provide definitive answers The experiment was negative, but at least I can publish the data somewhere
Correct within an order of magnitude Wrong
It might be argued that I have such a good answer for this objection that I shall now raise it
Much additional work will be required This paper is not very good, but neither are all the others in this
These investigations proved highly rewarding My grant is going to be renewed
I thank X for assistance with the experiments and Y for useful discussions on the interperetation of the data X did the experiment and Y explained it to me

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